Hello ladies, how are you?

SIS is starting a very special week. Valentine’s Week!

Yes, a whole week dedicated solely and exclusively to something we always enjoyed talking about.

LOVE.

A constant theme in movies, series, songs, books and soap operas. A very important feeling in our lives, that enchants us, moves mountains, heavens and earth.

But you must be wondering: SISter, why this topic?

I’m gonna explain!

As you may have noticed, we are Brazilians. And while in the rest of the world, Valentine’s Day is celebrated on February 14th because of St. Valentine’s, the truth is that we never heard of this gentleman.

Here the Saint is another one, his name is Antonio, and because he is known as matchmaker, Valentine’s Day was chosen to be on the eve of his day. Apparently the logic is this: one day you date, the other you propose.

It does not make any sense, but no one cares! The important thing is that we are different, lovers, passionate and we celebrate love on June 12th.

But SISter, why a whole week?

The answer is very simple: Just because!

Because it’s a special week and when we began to idealize it, we realized that something was missing. Yes, we have many columns, for all kinds of subjects, for all tastes. We are growing and expansion is always a good thing, but there was something missing, and it was directly tied to what made us become a group in the first place, made us who we are and got us to exactly to where we are now.

This missing part is called Outlander.

We have decided that we can not be oblivious to the story we love, dedicate, and are proud to follow, debate and reflect. We want to spread this love for Outlander to all 4 corners of this world.

Since it’s a week dedicated to love, nothing fayrier than start it with the story that broke our hearts, but we fell in love with it anyway!!!

It is a relentless desire to be immersed in this world created by Diana Gabaldon, who makes us look forward to the next chapter, the next book, next episode, next season and when we do not have anything new, we see and re-read everything again, in a never ending looping.

So, this column is devoted entirely to this story, and we will talk about curiosities, plots but mainly theories. Yes, we will!

That said, let’s get to what really matters, right?

Outlander has many couples and I could have chosen to talk about any of them and how they love each other and the different ways they relate to the love they feel. But I will not do that. In fact, I will do it, but in a more intimate way.

Not wanting to downplay Jenny and Ian or Marsali and Fergus, or the still-unmarried Roger and Brianna, but I chose to talk about my favorite couple, Claire and Jamie, and the lessons they have taught me. Perhaps in the near future we will speak more vehemently about all of them.

I will begin with mi lady:

Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp, raised by her uncle since she was five, met different cultures. A woman empowered and far ahead of her time, no matter what or when, she was not the typical housewife.

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She had her own profession when she fell in love with the charming historian Frank Randall. She married him at the age of 19, which may seem outrageous for our present day, but something extremely normal for that time.

Despite having spent only 2 of the first 8 years besides him, Claire loved Frank – some may disagree. She had a complete admiration for her husband, which made her pay attention to every single thing he said, even though it was not always an interesting subject for her.

No, Claire was NOT interested in history. She got bored easily and did not see the slightest grace in going to Machu Pichu to count rocks, but rather to enjoy the view, for example.

But she did not care, and that was what Frank liked. He loved being the teacher and she did not mind being the student.

If we stop to think about it, how often do we pay attention to things we simply hate, just because the people we love become very interested in such? It is part of any relationship to spend a little of our time on things that we usually wouldn’t only to make our partners happy. It is not a burden, much less boring, because it is part of it and you accept it.

Believe me, this is Love! You would never do this for a colleague. I would perhaps do it for a dear friend of whom I care a lot and mainly for the one that I love.

Claire was so aware of her feelings that, despite spending more time away than near him, she had a great sense of loyalty and was VERY AWARE OF IT. This is because she understood that it is humanly possible to be attracted to someone other than her spouse.

She spent a good part of her marriage away from her husband in the war taking care of all kinds of men, and that did not leave her immune from getting attracted to them, but she chose not to get into that, understanding that things were already complicated and that her husband was worth more than any romance.

Many don’t believe that there was love in Frank and Claire’s relationship, but they loved each other in their own way. It may seem strange, but this love is more common than we think. The kind where just to have the person around makes you feel good. The kind of love in which you feel a warmth in the heart, in which there is the comfort and affection.

This is the easiest to find and yes, it is one of many ways to love, although was the only way they both knew and it was the only love Frank had to offered and she accepted, offering him the same love back. But are there other ways?

Calm down, we’ll get there.

James Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser, stubborn, rebellious, extremely reckless. Questioner, very proud, spent more than half of his childhood getting beating up for being too curious, ending up doing wrong things or simply disobeying, but most of the time was a mixture of all these factors. Despite his demeanor, he learned to respect himself early on and cared a lot for his family.

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Jamie has always been fearless with his own life, not caring much about the consequences, such as kissing his oldest cousin, Dougal’s daughter. Cousins … who never? And did it while his uncle was at home and he obviously got spanked because of that. Yet he has always put his father’s wisdom into his life.

He learned that a man should never play with a girl’s feelings and should be responsible for his wife and children, and that there was no honor in getting a woman pregnant and abandoning her.

He listened intently to the story of how his parents met, struggled to stay together, and realized that if he ever got married, it would only be with the woman that he truly loved. He wanted to make his father proud, but most of all, he wanted to honor his mother’s memory.

He chose to remain a virgin, an extremely rare choice for ANY moment in TIME. He was very aware of his responsibilities. The question is: Would it be possible to love only one person for a lifetime?

This is the moment when two worlds collide. For Jamie, he had found the woman he would love for all his life, so he needed to please her immensely and show her affection. For Claire, it was difficult to understand how a man could give himself in such a way and still respect her as she is, wanting to love her as if it were the last thing he would do in life and protect her at all costs.

A word that was unknown in Claire’s vocabulary was now very much alive: INTENSITY!

Unlike Frank and his heart-warming love, Jamie was fire. Everything he did gave her butterflies in the stomach, goose bumps all over, difficulty in breathing, hands sweating, heart racing, and the only choice she had was to throw herself into his arms, hoping to suddenly create wings and fly to the skies above.

It was scary to her, this reality was totally different from what she knew. Frank was enough … until he wasn’t anymore! He would never love her that way, because that was Jamie’s way and no one in the world would love her like that. It was his way that made her question everything she had learned, ponder everything she had lived and allowed herself to transcend, choosing the reciprocity of what was being given her with so much passion.

With Claire, Jamie chose the prudence he did not allow himself to have. He took pleasure in watching over her, caring for her, protecting her, but also hearing and knowing every little thing about her. In a historical time where women was nothing more than a way for procreation, we can say that he was also a man ahead of his time.

They found their own way of living, of dealing with each other, of connecting through dialogue, sex, or the need to be together, facing crises, fights, virtues and failures. They have learned daily that living with can be problematic, but the most important thing is to find balance between the differences and the similarities.

They allowed themselves to admire each other, they were proud of their achievements and accepted that being in a relationship is learning  constantly, especially between wanting and giving. They lived moments of extreme happiness, but also moments of deep sadness. It was not easy, but they survived!

Jamie and Claire teaches us that each relationship is unique because each person is unique. Like Jamie, maybe his ideal was to love just once in life, and to stay with that person forever. Maybe you’ve lived with your partner for years and feel good about it. There is really no problem in having a partner and not wanting anyone else.

In a world where relationships are fragile and breakable and there is propaganda about how marriage represents the end of your life, be proud of your story because only you and your spouse would have lived it that way. Make no mistake, everyone wants and delights in good stories, especially when the people who experience them are evidently happy.

But if you, like Claire, came across something new and are frightened by the intensity or by any other factor, think how she pondered choosing Frank instead of any romance, because that would make her live with what she believes is the right to do, or what she considered when choosing Jamie over Frank, in spite of being surprised by it, because she knew she would be happier with him.

The new or the unknown usually frightens, but it takes courage to decide what is best for YOUR life and your story. Only you can write it and no one else! Maybe you haven’t had only one love in your life, but if so, have you thought that maybe there is someone out there more suitable and that fits better with your way of loving?.

I conclude by saying: Celebrate love intensely, ardently, unreservedly and above all, love in full, because sometimes … the stars lines up.

#PayMyTherapy

#PayMyCaipirinha

Author: Laís
Proof reader: Thaís e Bela
Translater: Bianca
Compiler: Flavia e Alexandra

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